I recently had the privilege to give a devotion at the baby shower of my new friend Becca Meyers. I was asked to do so because mine & Becca’s hearts are invisibly tied together by being moms of Spina Bifida warriors. Becca & her husband Richard are expecting their first baby girl in January and little Ashlynn Marie has a similar diagnosis to our son Tate. The way in which God crossed our paths to be a support and encouragement to one another is yet another instance where we can see his tapestry of grace & providence coming together. God so faithfully provided us with other families to support us when we received Tate’s diagnosis and we’re so honored that He would use us to encourage another family in the same way. Below is the devotion I gave to the ladies at Becca’s baby shower. Though most of you reading this are not moms of a child with a disability, I think you’ll still find it encouraging and helpful as you face whatever unique trial or season you may be going through. We have no way of knowing what the future might hold, but we know Who holds the future and so we can always count on the character of God even when we don’t know what to expect.
We’ve all heard of the book “What to expect when you’re expecting”. It’s a popular gift for new moms who soak up the contents in an effort to be fully prepared for their new adventure. Recently my husband and I got to talk with Becca and Richard about Ashlynn’s diagnosis and their journey thus far. When I asked Becca what questions she had she said, “well I guess just tell us what to expect.” We chatted about C-sections, NICU stays, support groups, and special baby item must-haves. I came across the following short essay written by a fellow special needs mother & I’d like to share it.
All first time mothers have a natural desire to know what to expect. For a special needs mama, that desire is stronger; it feels like the stakes are higher, the questions are bigger, the worries are many. The truth is, there’s only one thing I can tell you to expect with 1,000% certainty Becca & that is the character of God. God who is good and does good, sovereignly ordained for us to take a detour to Holland. When we’re feeling uncertain about the destination, the logistics, the finances; when we’re anxious about the future & impatiently waiting to have our many questions answered; when it’s impossible to know how to prepare or what to expect…We have a God whose character is steadfast. He never changes. He is not surprised or still working out the details. He is dependable. He is trustworthy. He is faithful. His love knows no bounds. What can you expect Becca? You can expect that the God who placed you on the flight to Holland will sustain you every step of the journey.
We typically talk about baby names at baby showers & perhaps the significance of the name. But let’s take a quick look at a few names of God- Here’s Who you can expect God to be as you begin your journey of motherhood with little Ashlynn Marie.
The first name of God is, Elohim: God, Mighty Creator. This is the best place to start because we know that Ashlynn is fearfully and wonderfully made by a wise Creator. Psalm 139:16 says that God knew Ashlynn before her body was even formed and that all of her days were written in God’s book before a single one has come to pass. Expect to see a beautiful and awesome miracle of a Mighty Creator when your eyes first see, when your hands first hold, & your lips first kiss little Ashlynn. You can expect to stare at her for hours and marvel in her Creator’s wisdom.
The next name of God is one of my favorites: Jehovah Jireh: The Lord Provides. From experience, you can expect God to provide your family’s every need whether it be financial, childcare, other moms who get it, grace for a difficult season, strength to face a trial, special equipment, the right doctors – you go ahead and count on the fact that He will meet every need. The Lord has reminded me of this name of His countless times over the past 3 years with Tate. Honestly I don’t know why I’m surprised anymore when He reveals himself as Jireh to us. You can expect that if God orchestrated a trip to Holland for you, He’s got the accommodations all lined up for your stay.
Another of my favorite names of God is El Roi: God who sees me. Hagar called God this when her and her son were close to death in the wilderness and He saved them. When it seems like everyone else is enjoying their time in Italy, it’s given me great comfort that my God sees me. He sees you Becca. He sees your tears, your faith, and He alone can make sense of your heart. It might seem like others don’t “get it” sometimes; but He does. The burdens of your heart can be completely invisible to others and yet completely seen by a loving God.
Another name for God is Jehovah Roi: The Lord is my Shepherd. Isaiah 40:11 says that God tends his flock like a Shepherd, he gathers the lambs in his arms close to His heart, and listen to this part: he gently leads those that have young. What beautiful imagery of how God leads us as mothers! He’s gentle. He allows the young ones to set the pace. Of course Psalm 23 describes the Lord as our Shepherd. I love how it says “He MAKES me lie down in green pastures.” Us type A mama bears sometimes need to be told to lay down & take a rest, the Shepherd has the watch. Becca you can expect your Shepherd to be gentle and kind with you. You can expect him to hold Ashlynn close to His heart. You can expect Him to lead you to still waters & restore your soul when you feel weary. And you can count on the fact that His goodness and mercy will be following you every step of the way.
In the wilderness God revealed Himself as Jehovah Rapha to His people, The Lord Who Heals. It’s been amazing to see the physical health that God has blessed Tate with despite his disability but also He’s graciously granted healing of any unmet expectations and the broken hearts we experienced upon the diagnosis. Psalm 147:3 says God heals the broken-hearted and binds up their wounds. What hope is ours in the Gospel that one day all that’s broken will be made whole since by His stripes we are healed.
When talking to you & Richard recently, my husband & I couldn’t help but notice that you both possessed such a peace. You’ve already gotten to know God as Jehovah Shalom: the Lord our peace. I’m sure you’ll agree that you’ve never felt more prayed for than you do in this season of life right now & it brings such a comfort. The only way to describe it is the way Scripture does, a peace that passes all understanding. Isaiah 26:3 says God keeps us in perfect peace when our minds are fixed on Him, when we trust in Him. There will be times your heart begins to wander or feels overwhelmed; cast your cares on Jehovah Shalom in prayer, remind yourself of Who He is, and when you’re overwhelmed cling to the Rock that is higher than your fears.
Jehovah Nissi means the Lord is my Banner. Moses called the Lord this after He helped Israel to win a great battle – this was the battle that Aaron held up Moses’s hands as Moses held up his rod. When Moses’s hands were lifted, the people prevailed. As Christians we can expect to battle spiritual warfare. As a special needs mama, your arms may grow weary. As you lift Ashlynn and your burdens to the Lord in prayer, allow other believers to bear those burdens with you & lift their arms in prayer to the Lord as well. No matter the battles you’re facing, they belong to the Lord. You’re fighting under His banner. The victory flag will carry His image. So fight on your knees with lifted hands; the Lord is for you. His banner over you is love.
Lastly, as you’re preparing for that journey to Holland, you can expect God to be Jehovah Shammah: which means, The Lord is There. Becca we talked about the temptation to pack a childhood or lifetime of worries into our minds & hearts at any given time for our special needs babies. But we know that Scripture commands us not to worry about tomorrow, what we’ll eat or wear, and there’s not an exception for mamas boarding for Holland, I’ve checked 😉 Here’s what you can expect about Ashlynn’s birthday, her surgeries, her doctor’s appointments, her first birthday, her schooling, her graduation – Jehovah Shammah. The Lord is There. He’s already there.
Becca, I am so excited for you to welcome your beautiful baby girl into the world very soon! Despite all the unknowns, I pray that you find great assurance in Who you can expect God to be in the days and years ahead. And remember, that you’re not alone; you’ve got a friend in Holland.
I hope these names of our never-changing God can be an encouragement to all of us, no matter the season or trial we’re walking through. Even when we don’t know what to expect, we can count on Him being Who He says He is. 🙌🏼❤️
By His Grace & My Grit,
Hilary Harrison
